What do my sisters think of My Sister？

　　From Ode to Joy, Everything’s Fine to My Sister, every film and television work of "Brothers" involving the issue of son preference will always become the focus of public opinion.

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　　On April 10th, the total box office of the movie My Sister broke 600 million.

　　The story of My Sister takes place in a patriarchal family, and the relationship between brother and sister is estranged. However, after her parents died in a car accident, her sister "Enron" faced a dilemma: giving up her dream of developing in a big city and raising her younger brother "An Ziheng" by herself; Or let others adopt their younger brothers and pursue their own independent lives?

　　Sister’s entanglement and pain can be imagined. In some families, brothers and sisters who are determined by blood will feel resistant and alienated from each other.

　　From the TV series Ode to Joy and Everything is Fine to the movie My Sister, every film and television work of "Brothers" involving the issue of son preference will always become the focus of public opinion.

　　The reporter of China Youth Daily and China Youth Network interviewed several "sisters" in real life and the creator of My Sister. Some sisters refused to go to the cinema to be "abused" because of problems with their younger brothers; Some sisters, crying uncontrollably during the movie, went home and wrote a long diary to review the story with their younger brother for more than ten years; Some sisters decided to have a good chat with their parents and untie the knot.

　　My Sister is not just a multiple-choice question. Do "sisters" have to choose between independence and sacrifice? How should parents of two-child families establish a healthy and positive educational concept? Female growth, brotherhood, and the concept of two-child family education … … These are issues that we need to examine outside the film.

　　"Where am I from" is a problem that everyone can’t get rid of.

　　Yin Xi, a girl born after 1995, has a younger brother who is 7 years younger. At first, she was poked in tears by the trailer of My Sister. This kind of experience, experienced people will understand, self-knowledge, not one or two simple labels can be summarized.

　　"I think of going home in the winter vacation in the first grade of primary school. My parents claimed that they had picked up a younger brother from the hospital gate. At that time, I had no feeling at all about this sudden extra child, because he suddenly appeared in my life, and my parents didn’t give me any time to warm up and accept."

　　This kind of brotherhood came from "airborne" without warning, especially when Yin Xi was young, she spent a long time accepting the fact and "reconciling with herself".

　　"When I see the plot of" My Sister ",I will think of the night when I was unaccompanied from the first grade to the fifth grade of primary school. On the night of power failure, I read a book with a flashlight, and I was very sad why my mother took my brother to my grandmother’s house but ignored me; During a rainstorm, the water in front of the school reached my knees, and all the children next to me had adults’ backs. I refused my strange grandmother’s kindness and walked alone with an umbrella. When I got home, I found that my mother actually came back. While helping me change my socks, I asked why I didn’t let the people next to me hold me. "

　　Yin Xi was puzzled for many years about her position in her parents’ hearts and why her younger brother existed. She felt that her world had "no mother" for quite some time. When she was in junior high school, she was complaining that her younger brother had "taken away" her mother.

　　Yin Xi said frankly that after recognizing the fact of "stealing her mother", she once disliked her brother very much. Until Yin Xi went to college and returned to school during the winter vacation, he accidentally found his fifth-grade elementary school brother and secretly wrote on the mist in the mirror of the sink: "Goodbye, sister, can you leave later?" At that moment, Yin Xi felt a sad mood in her heart, reflecting that she didn’t seem to be a good sister, and her brother would miss her when she was not at home.

　　"It took me a long time to make up with myself. My mother didn’t want me, but my brother also needed care." Therefore, Yin Xi feels that Enron’s alienation and entanglement with his younger brother in My Sister is real, and his desire to protect his younger brother is also real.

　　You Xiaoying, the screenwriter of My Sister, said that she would pay more attention to the "family" element when creating. "I think it is possible for a person not to experience love or have children in his life, but ‘ Where do I come from ’ It’s hard to break free. You can choose your friends and lovers, but parents and children can’t choose, just like my uncle said ‘ Children are debts ’ This debt was doomed from the beginning. "

　　You Xiaoying said that family has a profound influence on a person, so she wants to discuss women’s situation and self-growth from this aspect and express "the collision between family fetters and personal pursuits".

　　A bowl of water is flat, and good family of origin helps us tide over the difficulties.

　　After 90, Gugu, a media person, is 6 years older than his younger brother. After watching My Sister, her colleagues ridiculed that Gugu is not like a "sister" in the traditional impression of the public, because the whole person "can’t see the feeling of sacrifice".

　　"Now some people’s views are a bit extreme, opposing women’s independence and sacrifice." Gugu thinks that when it comes to elder sister, many people either think of pathetic "helping the younger brother" or "selfish ghost" who is too self-centered. These two impressions are too rigid. Why can’t elder sister and younger brother live in harmony and develop independently of each other?

　　After work, Gugu, who is financially independent, bought his younger brother a computer as a gift, considering his learning needs. My girlfriend was deeply impressed by the generosity of Gugu and sent a circle of friends. As a result, her friend commented at the bottom: "Ah, is this sister Fan Shengmei in Ode to Joy?"

　　Gugu was quite helpless when he learned that: "Why do you label all your sisters with bitterness without any understanding?"

　　Gugu and his younger brother have always had a good relationship since childhood, and his younger brother likes to stick to himself when he is at home in primary school. Gugu middle school lives on campus and goes home once a week. When you get home, you will see your brother sitting at the door waiting for you.

　　"In the final analysis, the misfortune of Enron in My Sister comes from the wrong idea that parents prefer sons to daughters. My brother and I can have deep feelings all the way ‘ Priming ’ I would like to thank my parents for always insisting on a bowl of water, not treating my brother and sister differently, and not ignoring my emotional needs. " Gugu also saw that families with bad relations between their brothers and sisters often caused wars because of their parents’ "willful preferences", causing emotional troubles for innocent brothers and sisters out of thin air.

　　Whether a good and fair educational atmosphere is formed in family of origin is very important for the cultivation of healthy and sunny brotherhood. In family of origin, where the environment is good, children with brothers and sisters may be better able to take care of the feelings of all members, and learn to share the pressure of parents’ roles and the potential risks in the period of family instability earlier.

　　Yin Ruoxin, director of My Sister, said frankly: "Everyone’s family of origin can’t be perfect, but a good family of origin can really protect you. The impact of the problematic family of origin will grow on the body, and it doesn’t know when it will emerge. "

　　In Yin Ruoxin’s view, family of origin’s influence can only be solved in a completely corresponding way. "When you are older, you will form a close relationship yourself, and then you will be able to solve those problems, but it is also possible that these traces will always be there."

　　You Xiaoying also believes that a good family of origin can help us to get through the hard times and cheer up.

　　"I have some friends, you think she is a completely independent woman, live very self, but she will find how many traces of family of origin in a moment. Family of origin’s shaping of character is still very profound, sometimes when you are unconscious. " You Xiaoying said.

　　Sisters independently do multiple-choice questions in life

　　Yoga Yu refused to go to the cinema to see My Sister — — Her younger brother is rebellious, and he is favored by his parents (focusing on the issue of education funds), so Yoga Yu foresees that watching movies is an act of "self-abuse".

　　However, Yoga Yu went to read the relevant comments in Douban and Weibo. She said that at this stage, I am afraid that I can’t solve the relationship problem with my younger brother, and the relationship with my parents is also "dark clouds rolling" from time to time, but she doesn’t want to be deeply entangled in the dilemma, which is tantamount to wasting time and emotions. It is better to actively live a good life in a big city and work hard for her career.

　　Yoga Yu firmly believes that no matter whether the relationship between elder sister and younger brother is hot or cold, the first priority is to stick to the path you want, which does not conflict with anything.

　　In the Douban review of My Sister, a "younger brother" said that he felt indebted to his sister. "As men and younger brothers, what can we do for our sisters? Perhaps we should start by respecting their will, understanding their plight and supporting their voices! "

　　It is undoubtedly commendable that "My Sister" directly pokes the pain point of the topic of "independent growth of women".

　　In the film, the role that forms a strong sense of dramatic contrast with Enron is the aunt. After Enron’s parents passed away, my aunt was the first to stand up and say the words "eldest sister is like a mother", telling Enron that the most important task now is to bring up his younger brother. This "moral kidnapping" is naturally easy to cause extreme discomfort.

　　Later, the audience found out that my aunt was the "elder sister" who was forced to sacrifice herself in the previous generation. She once dreamed in the distance, but now she can only read Russian to Russian dolls to pay homage to the youth destroyed by the words "eldest sister is like a mother".

　　You Xiaoying pointed out that the kindness of my aunt’s nature in the movie was suppressed by the daily necessities of life, but when Enron inspired her inner things, my aunt actually hoped that Enron could replace her to complete the image of a rebel. She saw another possibility in Enron’s life and didn’t want to stop it.

　　Arranging the dialogue between two generations of "sisters", You Xiaoying thought of the image of "Taowa". "Finally my aunt said ‘ Dolls don’t have to be put into the same condom, and they have to go their own way ’ It means that you can have your own life choices, and you don’t have to follow the path planned by everyone like your aunt. This is my aunt’s love and understanding of Enron. "

　　The ending of the movie is open, and there is no clear answer. Sisters outside the movie still have to do every question in life.

　　Yin Xi said that her younger brother, who is now in the third year of high school, "quietly grew up" in her invisible time. One of them is that under her influence, my brother is determined to pursue his dream of life independently, instead of reaching out to his parents for a better life. People need independence. Parents have paid a lot to raise themselves. The future involves personal problems. Parents help you because they love you, not because they have to. After all, you are an adult.

　　Gugu, who lives and works in a big city by her own ability, is also pleasantly surprised to find that her younger brother’s habits and values are subtly influenced by her. "Sisters always give priority to their own lives. If they have independent sisters, they will have independent brothers".

　　(At the request of the interviewee, Yin Xi, Gu Gu and Yoga Yu are pseudonyms)

　　Zhongqingbao Zhongqingwang reporter Shen Jiequn